I have been listening to the Saint-Saëns Christmas Oratorio. It's gorgeous and is making me think of my freshman year in college and ChoirMan and all of that. Today I transferred a slew of old cassette tapes into MP3 files-- a bunch of concerts from '96, '97 and '98. I also went to therapy this afternoon. Even thought it was only 4:00 when I set out, night was falling and the snow was coming down.
(The lights are floating stars.)
I talked to Brick on the phone for a while today and yesterday. Even though he's drinking and is trying to "control" it, he seems to be happy, and so I'm happy for him. He keeps telling me I'd like LA, but somehow I seriously doubt it.
As for Narc, he's in New Orleans and I have a bleeding bladder infection. Yuck. But it's okay. It's all okay for the moment because it is where it is. Therapy is helping me with acceptance. I really am feeling okay at this very moment.
Tomorrow night my AA group is having a huge holiday party. I'm going to take NDN. Cherubino and I are going to sing the duet from Lakmé, so she's coming over here a little early so we can practice.
Um... what else? That's it. At some point, I want to tell the story of what happened the night of Thanksgiving, but I'm still not up for it.
I am just loving the winter and trying to avoid the end-of-semester stress. I need to pick a day to do my sugar cookies and La Bohème. Since I've been off sugar for a while now, it would make sense to do them sometime before my birthday party so I can feed them to my guests.I'm feeling a little sad that it's my birthday next week. I'm not sure why. Maybe because things didn't "turn out" exactly as I had expected.
I'm kind of in love with Puccini right now, but whenever I think that I creep myself out because
B thinks Puccini looks just like my dad. I just wish one of these days I could prove Freud wrong.
In any case, I started reading The Idiot. It will probably be slow going because I have so much work to do right now, but maybe I'll be able to get into it after Christmas.
That's it for now.
Lots of love,
h
1 comment:
I don't know that too many people are where they expected to be from one birthday to the next. While that may be a bad thing, it might also be a very good thing- you could be preparing for something better than you ever imagined, you just don't know it yet.
You're alive, sober, surrounded by friends and family who love you, and you're moving forward towards your goals. You're not doing too badly, all in all. You're an amazing person who has inspired and continues to inspire.
Happy Birthday Hyde! *hug*
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