I keep thinking of that word... "Apotheosis." I don't know why. Probably because I miss Narc. And I miss having someone on whom I can dump my devotional aspirations.
I had dinner with my sponsor, Leseco, StarGazer and a few others last night. My sponsor (Cherubino) and her "sober-brother" had been to see the Bill W. meets Bob play that's on here in NY now. I forget the title of the play.
"Are you a Bill or a Bob?" they were asking around the table.
"What's the difference?" I asked Cherubino.
"You're definitely a Bob," she said.
"Which is--?"
"Bob blames himself for all of his problems. Bill blames everyone else."
I laughed. (Narc would definitely be a "Bill" then). The entire conversation was kind of silly and and dumb. But it reminded me of when my friends from college and I used to do try to analyze each others personalities based on our favorite movement of the Mozart Requiem.
Anyway, I'm a little depressed today and don't feel like writing much. I'm just grateful that I got those exams graded. I've been typing up my old diaries. I'm already almost back to 2002. If you ever feel like procrastinating, you can go check it out here. I've got diaries on my bedroom shelf going back to 1995. It's kind of a massive undertaking...
Okay. I'm going to return to my gloomy isolation now and then maybe rouse myself into doing something with my evening.
love,
h
PS: I bought season 1 of Rome and it just arrived. I am SO crushing on Mark Anthony still...
7 comments:
HydE! I wish we could hang out tonight. Remember how we analyzed people based on their "Rent" personalities? That was also pretty fun. Hang in there, miss you.
My bipolar is showing: I'm both Bill and Bob, depending on the day. *G*
Hyde why don't you go find someone who looks like Mark Anthony and start an affair? WTF you only live once. Do something just for yourself for a change.
"I laughed." Probably the best sentence I have ever read on your blog. You seem content.
I wish that I had been diligent about keeping my old diaries. Some of them I even purposely destroyed when I was done with a certain chapter of my life. Of course, now that they are gone, I think it would be fascinating to know what I was thinking back then.
Hyde, I've been meaning to share this recovery blog with you:
http://www.livinglifeinsideout.com/
She posts a quote and writes her own meditations. She has some great insights, and I thought you might like it. :0)
Sorry, I had to delete the previous comments, I got Bill and Bob mixed up. I'm definitely a Bob!
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